Day 2 - Rasa Hum

2
Rasa Hum
I am the essence of life.

Yes.

And THIS is life. I'm sitting in it, and it's sitting on me.

Phoebe's been bustling to turn off lights, find a suitable cushion, settling as close to me as possible and squirming in my lap trying to find her seat. More moving, adjusting, fidgeting, wanting things to be just so. Willoree is sitting facing me. We sit cross legged with our knees touching while Phoebe squirms between us. I have my hand on Willoree’s knee, and her hand is on top of mine. It's like we are the tolerant mothers of Phoebe, so is so perfectly four years old.

I can hear Willoree saying quietly to herself Rasa Hum, and she and I exchange a quick smile of acknowledgment before we close our eyes and deepen into our silent meditation time. Phoebe eventually falls asleep in my lap; I know this because I can feel her head dropping down into my lap off my arm, which was serving as her cushion. I think to myself: this is exceptional! This indeed is what meditation looks like in this crazy modern world, surrounded by a loud and needy family, the noises of an older home. It smells like dinner and feels like the end of a long day. It takes a minute or two to find my way into the quiet, but I do. And the kids do. Once there I get excited: the message is so simple: you absolutely can find peace and silence and connection in a world filled with chaos. We must! We don’t always have the pleasure of fine tune our surroundings to create what we want peace to give us...peace is inside. I am the pudgy, not too fit runner on the high school track racing after a peaceful feeling, trying to catch it, and peace is the team of encouraging running partners who, no matter where I go, fast or slow, are always cheering me on...waiting up, reminding me that the "finish line" is here, now, and always; giving great perspective and a cool drink of water.

Desire for peace is inside, and taking the time to touch in to that desire that puts me closer to living it. This is the essence of life.

Ben was on the sofa the whole time, but after we talked this morning about last night’s meditation and the cat puke, etc. I know he was attuned to the mantras yesterday and tonight as much as we were. And he was right there with us. Ben is the metronome in our lives: steady, steady, steady and reliable, quietly ticking and moving forward with all of us.